[ Adam's still trying to lock away the pain and anger because the last thing he wants is to break down crying or yelling in front of Andyr. He stares at a wall for long moments, listening but Andyr's words draw the pain back up and he has to blink quickly to chase away tears. ]

Ronan won't die. Everyone's so quick to believe that. [ Adam mumurs. But it'd never felt like the truth. He exhales heavily, rubbing his eyes harshly as if punishing them for tearing up. ]

I've been fucking honest with him and it gets me nowhere. I was never going to be good enough for him. I can't handle the things that he does and wants to do. He's not ready for me. Maybe he doesn't want to be or maybe we were wrong about us. He deserved someone better than broken trailer trash. I'm a mistake. [ And maybe Adam hoped that Ronan would end up chosing him after all was said and done but he knew right now Ronan wouldn't fight for him that he'd let him walk away and that is the worst part. Adam isn't the best thing that Ronan has and most likely Ronan would never come back to him because when he was ready it'd be for someone better than Adam. ]

I desesrve to stop getting hurt don't I? [ Was he supposed to stay with Ronan when all it brought was pain because Ronan isn't ready to be with him how Adam is with him? Breaking up wouldn't stop the pain but maybe he could stop pretending so much that he wasn't falling apart to everyone around him. Maybe at least it'd cap the amount of pain that there was.

Adam hadn't wanted to say any of these things. He hadn't wanted Andyr to see him fall apart and still only see part of the picture because Adam trying to protect him and trying to keep the other from running away and never coming back. ]