[It hurts, seeing Ronan wanting to kiss Andyr but he's seen that before.
But this is different because neither of them have to say no. He thought he was prepared for this but he's not really. It's not that he thinks he made the wrong choice. It's just something he hasnt been able to get Ronan to understand. He knows Ronan is still looking at it all wrong but Adam isn't sure how to remedy that yet.
But he couldn't get the images from the tent out of his brain, he couldn't forget Ronan admitting he has feelings, he misses what he had with Andyr. It's all burned miserably into his brain. His fingers are still tightly laced in Ronan's hand and he makes himself watch.
It's a beautiful thing. Andyr is attractive almost as much as Ronan. It's a beautiful sort of torture maybe. Andyr is so much better at it all. The way he supports ronan... Adams not so good at that. Adam really isn't good at anything but being a liability.]
no subject
But this is different because neither of them have to say no. He thought he was prepared for this but he's not really. It's not that he thinks he made the wrong choice. It's just something he hasnt been able to get Ronan to understand. He knows Ronan is still looking at it all wrong but Adam isn't sure how to remedy that yet.
But he couldn't get the images from the tent out of his brain, he couldn't forget Ronan admitting he has feelings, he misses what he had with Andyr. It's all burned miserably into his brain. His fingers are still tightly laced in Ronan's hand and he makes himself watch.
It's a beautiful thing. Andyr is attractive almost as much as Ronan. It's a beautiful sort of torture maybe. Andyr is so much better at it all. The way he supports ronan... Adams not so good at that. Adam really isn't good at anything but being a liability.]